My fifteen year old daughter, Ella, is a dancer. She’s been dancing for nine years, six of those years competitively. I am not a dancer, so when she first started this whole world was brand new to me. I’ve watched her grow from the little jazz dancer wearing a hat that was way too big and covered her eyes, where she was sometimes a count or two behind, to making the varsity dance team as a freshman in her high school. Prior to being on the high school dance team, Ella was a studio dancer for years, spending hours at the studio every single night. It was her home away from home. She was there through the dinner hour, she would come home most nights and make herself something to eat and then she’d start her homework. When my husband and I would go out of town, the family members who watched our kids always remarked about how hard Ella worked, and how they couldn’t believe how rigorous her schedule was. But she LOVED it! She rarely complained about going. Dance is her thing, and this was her community. She felt loved and connected and valued at Little Theatre.
A Little Background
Ella was on her studio competition team for 5 years. We’d go to these competitions, the girls would do their dance routine, and then we’d wait for awards. The awards program was interesting and again this was all new to me. Sometimes they would get high gold, sometimes platinum, it was always pretty ambiguous and a little anti climactic. It definitely wasn’t what I was used to as a sports fan, where you play a game and you win or you lose. In my experience, there is a season where you have a certain number of games. You hope to have a winning record, make it to the playoffs, and then ultimately there is a champion. There is always an ending. Dance is different. It’s year round. There isn’t a “season”, there aren’t breaks besides the occasional week off for Christmas or spring break. At least this has been the case for Ella. To be a dancer you have to be incredibly dedicated! You have to be willing to put in long hours and not necessarily get “a win.” Dance is always about perfection. You don’t fumble the ball and get another chance in the same game. You only have one shot to execute the perfect performance.
High School
However, now that Ella is dancing on the high school dance team, it’s a little different. The hours and commitment are actually more intense, the precision has to be even more accurate, the stakes are higher because now when she competes, her team is competing against other high schools and they can place 1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc. They have regionals, state and nationals. This is a little more of what I’m used to (as a sports fan) But you still only have one shot at executing your performance perfectly, so the pressure is always high. A couple weeks ago Ella’s team took 1st place at UDA regionals in the Hip Hop category. After their performance you could see it all over their faces, they knew they had nailed it! When it came time for awards, they gathered in a circle on the gym floor holding hands as did all the other teams. When the announcer got to our catorory he started the countdown… 6th place goes to…. 5th place goes to… With each announcement, I got a little more nervous because I wanted so badly for them to place high. When we didn’t hear our school name announced in second place, I looked at the girls, and it was in that moment that they knew they took FIRST, that they were champions. I can’t even describe the look of joy on their faces! Then the announcer said “1st place goes to Chatfield High School.” The cheering, the excitement, the jumping up and down and hugging, the relief, it was amazing! These girls have been working so hard, putting in long hours, practicing for their own competition season, being at the football games as well as other sporting events as part of their school commitment, not to mention getting their studying done. And to see it all pay off was just incredible!
Waiting for the Win
When we got in the car, Ella was over the moon. She said, “I’ve never won anything before. This is the first time I’ve ever gotten first place.” And this just really got me thinking… would I be willing to put the hours and hours into something like she has done with dance for literally years and wait for the win. It took her 9 years to get first place. I don’t know about you but I am a fan of instant gratification. When I start something I want to see results, I want to get a win. I obviously know that wins don’t happen overnight, but am I willing to wait 9 years? Am I willing to work day in and day out? Am I willing to be disciplined? Am I willing to do the same thing over and over again, practice over and over again? This really got me thinking. Why is she willing? And what I realized is she’s doing what she loves with people she loves. Is every practice awesome? Of course not. Is it ever hard? Most definitely. But the key is community. A community of people sharing something they love, working hard at something they love. Even with Ella’s rigorous high school dance team schedule, she still takes one class a week at her studio because this has been her home away from home for years, and she has such deep connections there. From her amazing teachers who have been such a positive influence on her, really they are the two adults whom she has spent the most time with outside of her dad and me, to her fellow dancers. These girls have grown up together, are still growing up together. And then she has this newer community, the Chatfield Poms team. These girls and their coaches, having each others’ backs, spending hours together, developing relationships, sharing a passion and knowing that together (even though there will be challenges), they are stronger and better. What this experience has taught me yet again is that it’s all about community. When we’re in it together, sharing laughs, sharing tears, sharing life, it becomes about the journey, and when we finally get that win, that first place trophy, the reason it’s so sweet is because of the blood, sweat, and tears and the fact that they were shed and earned together.
I’m so glad we’ve begun this journey, this sharing sisterhood. We might all have different goals, be in different seasons, but we can be on the same “team” encouraging one another, sharing and connecting because it’s true that life is better together.
