Here we are closing in on 2019 and getting ready to start a brand new decade. I doubt I’m the only one who has spent some time lately reflecting on this last decade, thinking about where I was as 2009 was closing and where I am today. At the end of 2009 our youngest, who is now 10 years old, was a baby, the rest of our kids were school age, and I was a teacher, a really good teacher I think. That decade from 2000-2009, I became a mom, was raising our kids with my husband and had found my niche in education as a first grade teacher. At that time a lot of my identity was wrapped up in being a wife, a mom and a teacher. But by the end of 2009, I was struggling to juggle it all. Struggling to do justice to my kids at home, my kids at school, being back at work after having a baby, pumping in the bathroom so I could continue breast feeding, supporting my husband’s career as an elementary principal which was demanding, helping my kids with their school work, getting them to and from their after school activities, dinner, bath, bedtime. You get the picture. I’m sure many of you have been there or are in the midst of it right now. You can also probably guess who I talked to daily about my struggles… yes, my sisters.
A Necessary Change
That spring I decided to leave my career in education. In this new decade I would no longer be Mrs. Freeman, the teacher. The teacher who was often requested by parents. The teacher who was respected by the school leadership and my colleagues. I gave that up to be home with my kids, and I’ve honestly never regretted that decision. This decade that we are closing out in just over a week has once again been defined by motherhood and parenting, but in the last ten years, I also became a business owner, and this experience has required me to dig deep into personal development, deep into how to be a leader, deep into stepping out of my comfort zone and stepping into the person I was created to be. It’s been crazy hard, but crazy good. I still have a long way to go, but I am proud of what I’ve learned and the progress I’ve made. Have you ever noticed how closing one door allows another to open? If I’d never have left my career in education, I likely would not have taken the leap of faith and started my own business. All the people I’ve met, the experiences I’ve had, they’ve would never have happened. This reminds me of that poem by Robert Frost, “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by and that has made all the difference.” I wouldn’t say my road is less traveled, but when you make a decision to start down one path, you are saying no to another and yes to all the experiences and people you’ll meet on the chosen road. What has your road looked like the past 10 years? Has it been one of joy, one of grief, one of many changes or one that’s needed diverging from? Likely it’s been winding, some uphill, some down, part of it smooth and part of it rough. Such is life, right?
What’s next?
As I was thinking about all of this the other day, I started to wonder about what will define me in the next decade? What will be on my road these next 10 years. Motherhood of course. But that is changing. My kids are getting older and my role of being an air traffic controller has changed to one of being more like a coach. It is a bit less time intensive and much more emotionally intensive. They need me just as much or more, and yet what that looks like is different than at the start of 2010. My marriage. What do I want my marriage to look like in the next ten years? How can my husband and I stay close, make our relationship stronger? My career. How can I continue to grow my business and show up for my team even better in the next ten years? My faith. My faith has changed a lot over the last decade. I’ve doubted everything, asked a million questions, but for me, at the end of the day it all comes back to Jesus Christ. In my heart of hearts, I know He is worth believing in and pursuing with my whole heart and soul, and everything else can be figured out later. I hope I can be a person who loves and lives more like Him in the next ten years.
My reason for sharing all of this is because I think it’s valuable to take inventory of our life, where we are, where we are going and what better time than the end of a decade? I hope that today by reading my story, you will take some time to think about the story of your last decade. To see where you’ve been and how far you’ve come. And to most importantly paint a vision of what you want your future decade to look like. Here are some questions I’m asking myself, and I thought you might like to as well.
What relationships have had the most impact on me? Are they positive or negative?
What experiences have had the most impact on me? Were they positive or negative?
What do I want to do more of in the next decade? Less of?
How do I want to show up for people? For myself?
What is one big goal I want to accomplish?
If you’re so inclined we’d love for you to comment on what has defined you this past decade and what’s on your mind as we head into 2020!
