Are you a “glass half full” kind of person or do you tend to see the down side of things? I think we all want to say we’re positive, it sounds better that way, doesn’t it? No one wants to be the Negative Nelly. But we’ve also been through some things and probably gotten burned a time or two. So we may have developed a tough exterior, a bit of armour to protect us from being disappointed. Keep your expectations lower to avoid being let down.
It’s also just kind of human nature. We might appreciate when things go well, but we don’t get on the phone with our sister and sing the praises of the kids that put their laundry away and unloaded the dishwasher. At least not as often as we commiserate about the teen with the poor attitude or the socks left by the couch.
In groups, the dynamic is often shifted positively or negatively in a big way through pack mentality. We’ve all had the hockey team (or something similar) where the one disgruntled parent can spread their negative feelings to the whole team. Often we don’t even realize it’s happening right away and before you know it, the season just lost all of it’s fun. One person’s focus on one bad situation can change everything.
The same can happen in a positive direction and I’m working on doing better at being the person that makes that shift. There’s no reason that we can go down a negative rabbit hole but not a positive one. I witnessed this first-hand recently in a professional situation. Things didn’t go as planned and there was plenty to be negative about. It was almost panicky. But then the power of positivity completely flipped the narrative. Some very smart women with clear heads and hearts stood up and said, “Not today, Karen.” And it was magical.
It happens in families too and we 100% have the power to dictate how it plays out in ours. After a tough conversation the other day, my husband Josh and I pledged complete positivity for our home. That’s not to say we were always negative before, not at all. But this was a conscious decision to look at every situation from a positive side, to literally try to “out-do” each other with gestures, love, and understanding. To face kid situations looking for the good. To assume positive intent and give grace. And it’s been so great. We’re talking through, handling, resolving, and enjoying being completely in control of the dynamics of our household.
It’s such an empowering feeling to take control of our own attitudes and mindset. We get to decide the force we want to be.
