Recently I shared a social media post on what I was choosing “more” and “less” of in the new year. More miles, less haste, more books, less clutter, more water, less sugar. You get the idea. One of the “mores” I didn’t mention was “more faith.” For varied reasons, my faith life is something I’ve been pulling away from over the past couple of years. This past December, I began leaning back in. It started because I wasn’t “feeling” the Christmas spirit. I was unmotivated to put up my tree and Christmas decor, which was very unlike me. I could feel that something was missing. It was a Saturday afternoon, and I thought, “I’m going to go to Mass.” I hadn’t been in a long while (discounting funerals), and I actually found it very peaceful. So I kept going …. throughout December, on Christmas Eve, back home in North Dakota. I found myself relishing the rhythm of the liturgy and the quiet, meditative aspects of being at Mass, of being in church.
Fast forward to about a week ago, I read some disappointing remarks from the Vatican. My first thought was “Ugh, I’m out… yet again.” However, on Sunday afternoon, as I was contemplating going to evening Mass despite my disappointment, I thought, “you know what, the Pope is not God. And my spirituality does not revolve around what the Vatican says or doesn’t say.” So I went. And our dear neighbor, a Carmelite priest, said the Mass. He gave the most beautiful, heartfelt, and meaningful homily. Part of his message was centered on the need for silence, for quiet moments to hear God. The next morning I asked God what he wanted me to know that day (a practice I learned from the amazing Liz Gilbert but haven’t really leaned in to lately) and he shared something with me… essentially his message was for me to be where my feet are planted and to wait on him. It deeply resonated with me. The reason I took the time that morning to ask God was because of the message I heard at Mass. The encouragement to first of all quiet the noise and secondly to listen.
Why am I sharing all of this? Well, because if you’re feeling the nudge to lean in to something this year, to have “more” or “less” of something, my encouragement to you is to listen to the nudging of your heart. From time to time, you may be disappointed by people (like I was), but you’ll never be disappointed by the loving spirit leading you, whether you call it God, Spirit, the Universe, or simply Love. One of my hopes for all of us this year is that we can find quiet moments to pause, to listen and to lean in to the nudges of our hearts. Happy New Year.
