I don’t know about you but January felt more like a year than a month, so I am in a let’s bring on February mood! I mentioned last month that one thing we want to do in and with our Like a Sister community is focus on one positive habit a month. At the end of the year, we’ll have twelve new habits that we did for at least one month each. And hopefully the ones that you find to be the most beneficial might become life long ones. Last month was all about practicing gratitude. By the end of January I had written down 155 gratitudes. This is definitely a habit I will be continuing! It helped create a positive outlook on each day and trained me to always be on the look out for the good. It’s a new month, and it’s time for a new habit!
February’s Habit
It’s February and so we thought it would be fitting for us to pursue a habit that is beneficial to our relationships. After all it’s the month of “Galentines” and “Valentines.” The new habit we picked for this month is to “Assume Positive Intent.” Simply put this means giving the person you are in a relationship with the benefit of the doubt and believing they have good intentions in what they say and with they do. It’s assuming the best about them.
Mindset
This habit is all about mindset. We are in charge of our brains. It’s choosing to focus on the good, not the bad. It’s choosing to believe the best, not the worst. What we choose to focus on becomes our reality, it decides how we feel and how we act. Let’s face it. How easy is it to let our minds get the best of us? We can easily find ourselves spirally down a negative rabbit hole. On the other hand, when we are intentional about assuming positive intent, the exact opposite happens. We feel better and our relationship thrives. It’s really kind of amazing what happens in our hearts and minds when we decide to start focusing on the good.
My Own Experience
My family participates in the season of lent, a six week long season in the Christian church that leads up to Easter. Many people choose to give something up during this time, candy, alcohol, television, etc. Instead of giving something up, Mike and I decided to focus on our marriage during the six weeks and implemented some healthy habits. Assuming positive intent was one of them. What this looked like was every day making the choice to see the other in the best possible light. It wasn’t about being naive and bottling up frustrations. Rather it was recognizing that instead of thinking the other wasn’t doing enough or helping enough or contributing their fair share, we chose to believe they were doing their best. We chose to believe that our house is a busy one, needs with our kids pop up unexpectedly and that even though some of our smaller priorities weren’t the same (like loading dirty dishes into the dishwasher or simply rinsing and stacking them by the sink) our larger priorities are in sync, and that’s what’s important. I can honestly say that at the end of those six weeks, our relationship was healthier, stronger, more loving and more forgiving. A lot of the credit goes to implementing the habit of assuming positive intent.
What’s Next
For the month of February let’s choose one person that we are in a relationship with. This could be our spouse or partner, it could be a parent, family member, friend, boss, co worker, or a child. Write that person’s name down and every day commit to assuming the best about that person. Let’s assume positive intent as a sisterhood. Let’s draw on one another’s energy and positivity. We are here to help, to check in with you, and we’ll also be sharing some resources! The best way to stay in the loop is to subscribe to our blog! You can also find us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/groups/2182734028690186/ and follow us on Instagram @likeasister.co
